The Story Behind the Photograph - Leonard and the whole Bandage Affair

Recently my friend Miss Trashahasee over at the Trashology Blogspot was involved in an accident involving a Treadmill and a Laptop, in which she skinned her knees and then couple days later claimed it was a broke shoulder. (Probably had a trampoline in there too.) Hope she gets better soon, those knees..oh, I mean Broke Shoulders can be right painful. Anyway it reminded me of the above picture. Leonard had emptied that case of Michelob he’d carefully hidden in the lawnmower shack at the corner of the back garden. Now while lying in his driveway counting stars and got fascinated by the light bulb at the top of the flag pole in his front yard. He became convinced it was an alien space ship and that he was about to be abducted and experimented on in ways he mostly wouldn’t like. Leonard jumped up (always a mistake) and ran for his life. In just three strides he ran full face into the steel garage door which he’d left rolled half open. (Or half closed, depending on your point of view.) Leonard’s face stopped running while the rest of Leonard continued on toward the Studebaker. When Leonard came around again, he stood up catching the top of his head on the garage door, which understandably was still there. He reeled and tumbled again this time striking the back of his head on the Studebaker’s back bumper. Even in his dazed state, experience told Leonard that his head ache was not your basic hangover. Although he didn’t seem to be cut, he did feel that the bumps about his head certainly deserved an ouchie bandage or two. In the half-bath medicine cabinet Leonard couldn’t find any strips except the tiny, brightly decorated ones commonly used on minor but “important” injuries such as a paper cut on a child’s pinkie finger. So just to be safe, Leonard used the whole package on his head. By the time he had opened and peeled and pasted 35 of those miniature strips of smiley faces, butterflies and leopard spots, he was exhausted. Leonard’s wife found him a couple days later, asleep between the commode and the wall. She used up the rest of the film in her Brownie Hawkeye getting snapshots for future reference and of course, bargaining leverage. Getting adhesive strips out of Leonard’s hair was a slow and painful task. His wife participated in most of the painful segments, all the while exuding a rather delighted sympathy. Leonard could not wear a hat for several weeks after that. The subject of his alien abduction never came up. Leonard could not wear a hat for several weeks after that.

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